Being Adopted As An Adult
It’s interesting when you are an adult and friends’ mothers want to adopt you or…maybe you want them to adopt you. I think it might be a little of both. There really is something about mothers. I think it is because they carried you for 9 months and a special bond was created right from the start.
This situation of adoption happened after my aunt and uncle died. I had them for awhile after my mother died and they had always been my adopted parents even when I was little…but that is another story.
So I was adopted by three wonderful mothers. They made sure that I was OK and that my birthday was remembered and I alway received a card on holidays. They included me in events that they knew I would attend. Only specific events, for certain family members. They knew me so well and knew my issues with traditions. One even attended my graduate school graduation.
One has died and one is very sick and the other is 91 and always writes letters to me.
These lovely women knew they couldn’t replace my own mother and they never tried. What they did do for me is love me, understand my silence, and my need to be by myself at times. They had this innate ability to just know when to be in my life and when it was OK for me to not connect, like Mother’s Day. It was OK for me to connect the next day or the day before. I would always send cards for mother’s day, but not mother’s day cards.
I thank my friends for letting me share their mothers with me. They all knew that my relationship with their mothers was special and that their mothers’ relationships with me was special too.